ALL THE PRETTY FLOWERS

Disclaimer: girlie post.

I'm probably not going to blog about all the books I read in my book group, I am going to blog about "Peony In Love." Peony was supposed to be September's book and we finally had our discussion of it last Thursday. When I started reading, I thought we were reading an epic love story, based on true events (as true as any historical account can be), and when the main character dies after just a few chapters, I put the book down in disgust! To be honest, I'm not a fan of romance novels to begin with, so ghost romance is way down there on my list of stuff to read. Luckily I decided to pick it back up again and finished it anyway. Peony was not the best book I've ever read, but it reminded me of some really important issues... namely the struggles we face/have faced simply because we are born female. It reminded me of how far we have come, but also of how much things haven't changed over the ages. Peony is set in 16th century China just after the Manchus invaded in what they called the Cataclysm. Women had been, for centuries, valued only for their beauty and their ability to produce sons. In order to be considered beautiful and refined, they had to start mutilating their bodies at a very early age. Foot binding was practiced and continued to be practiced in China clear into the 20th century. Yet, women had been writing poetry and had been published by men in China for a thousand years before this time. A strange juxtaposition I thought. So it got my mind turning in a couple different directions.

How much different are we today? What are we, as women really valued for in our "modern" society? If we have become so enlightened and liberated, why do we still continue to mutilate our bodies in the name of beauty? Especially when we know that beauty is so fleeting. True, we don't bind our feet, but we all know what I'm talking about here. And is it possible that our obsession with physical beauty has been our own greatest enemy on our path to equal rights? These are just questions I've had, not conclusions I've actually come to believe. I'm also not absolving any other party from their blame in the oppression game.

Yet, I think we women know that only a handful of us will be remembered through the ages based on our physical beauty. Often those are the women who die young. I believe what we really want in the end is to be heard. Whether it's through the stories we tell our children, our writing, the canvas, in song or deeds, we want to leave something behind. So it made me think that if we are going to continue to push for anything, maybe it should be for our freedom of expression. The freedom to be the women we each WANT to be. The freedom to put our desires into action or art.

Reading Peony reminded me how many women who, at this very moment, still do not have a voice. It reminded me how much I don't say because I'm afraid somebody may not like it, I might offend someone else. Well, at least I have that option! And if I did decide to voice my opinion (and don't get me wrong, I voice it often enough) the worst thing that would happen is that someone might disagree, someone might not like it. So keep talking ladies, keep telling our stories, and keep your opinions coming, because these things will be our legacy.